How to Show Fondness and Admiration to Your Partner

“I fell in love with him the way you fall asleep. Slowly, and then all at once.” -The Fault in Our Stars

Do you ever feel so angry with your partner that you feel as if you just do not have anything nice to say? You struggle to come up with the words to show them love or highlight the positive aspects of your relationship. Do you ever feel as if you can't even find anything good that has been going on in your relationship lately? Well, we’re here to let you in on a secret that many people feel this way at one point or another in their relationships. Sharing fondness and admiration can be a very difficult task in relationships, especially in situations of frustration and resentment. Even though it is difficult, it is very important to continue to stay alive in your relationship. In this blog, we will be discussing how to keep fondness and admiration alive in your relationship and why it is so important. 

To begin with, in strong healthy relationships love, unfortunately, it’s just not enough. Just knowing that you love each other and not showing it or expressing it can be very damaging to a relationship. Showing love and your fondness and admiration for your partner helps create a positive environment in the home and a relationship where you both feel valued, respected, and appreciated. Fondness and admiration in your relationship can also assist with intimacy and connection as well. So let's explore how to express fondness and admiration in your relationships no matter the state of your relationship. 

Tips for Showing Fondness and Admiration in Your Relationship 

1. Use Kind Words: verbal affirmation is one of the most effective ways to express love and admiration to your partner. Phrases and words such as compliments and expressions of gratitude can make the verbal affirmation feel genuine. Compliments for your partner can also appear to be heartfelt and appreciated during times of stress and difficulty in the relationship. Ex) Say words or phrases such as I really appreciate when you … or I love what you did for me today.

2. Be Emotionally Supportive: During challenging times motivational language and encouraging words are imperative for supporting your partner and improving emotional intimacy. When we are feeling down, the last thing we need is to be further criticised by our partners and unappreciated. Always, but especially during times of distress and challenge, focus on being emotionally supportive to your partner. Stating small things like these examples go a long way: “I know how important this is for you…” “You got this…” “It’s going to be ok because you’re so good at…..”

3. Express your Love: When couples have exited the limerance phase of their relationship and have been together for long periods of time expressing love and gratitude for your partner can become scarce. We often forget that just because we love our partner doesn't mean that we don't have to continue to express it throughout the course of our relationship. Even during or after a fight or regrettable incident, expressing “I love you" is very important and can encourage healing and successful repair. 

4. Small Things Often: Don't forget the little things! Lifetime, books, and other forms of entertainment can make romance seem like an expensive exaggerated production. Helicopter rides over the city and trips to an over-the-water bungalow in Bora Bora are fantastic but these luxuries are nice but not the only way. While these forms of admiration can be appreciated, sometimes it's about the little things that matter the most and create the biggest impact. Small things such as physical touch (hugs, back rubs, hand holding), small acts of kindness, running an errand, eye contact, and spontaneous gestures can be fantastic ways to show that you care and express fondness and admiration for your partner. 

5. It's not always about you. Make it about your partner: Focus on your partner's needs. Paying attention to what your partner needs at the moment without your own personal opinions can be very impactful in a relationship. Utilize active listening to provide words and phrases of understanding and really focus on how your partner feels especially in vulnerable moments. 

6. Celebrate Every Win: Achievements both big and small all mean something. Celebrating every win can be motivational and encouraging to your partner and make them feel appreciated. After all a win is a win, isn't it?

All in all, sharing fondness and admiration can be challenging in situations that are fueled by anger, frustration, or relational stress. Also, it is common to forget to foster fondness and admiration in your relationship when we have been together for a long period of time. It is definitely a practice to keep in mind on a regular basis. Try it for a few days and you will see the significant impact it can have on your relationship satisfaction!

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